How one working mom’s hard-earned wisdom transforms helplessness into empowerment

“It’s not your fault, but it is your problem.”

At first glance, this might sound harsh—even unfair. But for Melissa Kascak, these seven words represent one of life’s most liberating truths. In her chapter for The Wisdom Collection, she unpacks this powerful concept that has transformed how she navigates challenges as a working mom, coach, and human being facing life’s inevitable curveballs.

The Power Behind the Problem

Melissa’s core message is deceptively simple yet profoundly transformative: “Just because something is not ultimately your fault, it’s not something that you caused, you still have the power to affect the outcome of that result.” This isn’t about taking blame for things beyond your control—it’s about reclaiming your agency when life feels overwhelming.

The distinction matters enormously. When we focus solely on fault, we often get stuck in helplessness. But when we acknowledge that even unfair situations can become our problems to solve, we suddenly have options. We can move from “this sucks and there’s nothing I can do” to “this sucks AND I can do something about it.”

From Photography to Life Philosophy

Melissa traces this wisdom back to her photography professor who, faced with a flawed negative that ruined her project, told her exactly that: “It’s not your fault, but it is your problem.” What could have been a moment of artistic defeat became a life-changing lesson in taking ownership without taking blame.

This lesson has since become the backbone of how she approaches everything from parenting challenges to client coaching. “It’s something that I’ve used for myself… It’s something that I’ve definitely used with my children as a mom, as a working mom,” she explains. When problems arise—whether caused by others or circumstances beyond anyone’s control—this framework provides a way forward.

The Courage to Share Wisdom

What makes Melissa’s story particularly compelling is her honesty about the vulnerability required to share wisdom publicly. She describes participating in The Wisdom Collection as being willing to “stand on that stage in my underwear and let people see me.” It’s a vivid metaphor for the exposure that comes with claiming expertise and sharing hard-earned insights.

“I think maybe I’m at the point in my life where I don’t really care if people see me in my underwear on the stage,” she admits. This isn’t recklessness—it’s the kind of authentic courage that emerges when you have something valuable to offer and you’re finally ready to share it.

The Ripple Effect of Empowerment

Melissa’s approach doesn’t just help individuals—it transforms entire family and work dynamics. When children learn that they can take action even when situations aren’t their fault, they develop resilience. When teams embrace this mindset, they become solution-focused rather than blame-oriented. The ripple effects extend far beyond the initial problem.

Her chapter demonstrates that some of the most powerful wisdom emerges from the simple decision to take action when others might retreat into victimhood. It’s about recognizing that while we can’t control what happens to us, we always retain the power to influence what happens next.

Finding Your Voice in the Collective

Perhaps most importantly, Melissa’s experience with The Wisdom Collection illustrates the power of sharing wisdom in community rather than going it alone. “Instead of just being a lone author, it’s a great way to feel like part of something bigger than myself,” she reflects. This collaborative approach makes sharing wisdom less intimidating and more impactful.

Her story reminds us that expertise doesn’t require perfection—it requires experience, reflection, and the courage to help others navigate challenges you’ve already faced.

The Wisdom Collection: Stories That Transform How We Live, Connect, and Lead releases June 24th. Melissa Kascak’s chapter offers a roadmap for anyone who’s ever felt powerless in the face of circumstances beyond their control.

Ready to transform your own challenges into wisdom worth sharing? Contact Summit Press Publishers by hitting reply to explore how your hard-earned insights could become part of our next life-changing collection.